The good and the bad
This Asian is strange.
I don't know what brought on this random entry, perhaps it's a combination of my insomnia (damn my fucked up body-clock) and the reading of random Gaysian blogs. I find it really strange when Asian boys perpetuate the common Asian stereotype that's set here in Australia. And I have to admit, my own racism and Anglo-like antics perpetuate the same stereotypes too. I've had a realisation that gay-Asian boys have a lot more power in the gay community than I previously thought. Maybe it's maturity and self-confidence that allows me to think this. But I think things are changing.
I used to be embarrassed, even ashamed of the gay Asian community. I thought it was so trashy and pathetic and nasty that I would never become apart of it. I guess it was a combination of growing up in an Anglo private school -where the amount of racism against the 10 Asians in my year level was incomprehensible at times-, mixed with the stereotype and associations with rice queens, sticky rice (rice cookers?) and all that jazz. These days I laugh everything off. I don't have time to letterbox everyone and analyse situations. I just wanna do my thing and go my own way.
Going out on the scene in Melbourne over the past couple of months now, has really shown me a lot. Not trying to make this entry depressing, but being a halfcast really sucks at times. Everyone's like 'Ohh, that's really cool, you're a mix...' But really, it's a bitch. Especially being a halfcast and born in a country where neither of your parents are native... And then being gay...Uh. Genetic disposition seems to compensate most of us by making us gorgeous. Haha.
Mariah, you were wrong, you never really belong. When you're hanging with your mum's friends and family, you're the kid who's not all quite there, and vice versa with your father's friends and family. When you're at home, you are brought up three different ways. In this case, Filo, Khmer and Anglo. When I'm out with my Anglo friends, I'm the token Asian. When I'm out with my Asian friends, I'm the stuck-up Australian born. I hate when people assume I'm Anglo, and when they meet me in person, they're taken aback. I hate when people assume I can't speak English (a la that fucker in Kings Cross when after I spoke to him, he said 'Oh, I didn't realise you could speak English' Fuck you!) when really, my English shits all over those fuckers.
At the end of the day, there may be crap that comes with being a 'mix' but I do love being different. I love that I know no other Filobodians. I love that I'm Australian born, and I love being gay (hmm hussy...). At the end of the day, I know heaps of shit that no one else does about so many different cultures. And I'm better for it.
This entry just went in one big circle. It was an affirmation. Thanks for reading.
Really. Time to sleep.
PunkOnAir : Kelly Clarkson - Walk Away
I don't know what brought on this random entry, perhaps it's a combination of my insomnia (damn my fucked up body-clock) and the reading of random Gaysian blogs. I find it really strange when Asian boys perpetuate the common Asian stereotype that's set here in Australia. And I have to admit, my own racism and Anglo-like antics perpetuate the same stereotypes too. I've had a realisation that gay-Asian boys have a lot more power in the gay community than I previously thought. Maybe it's maturity and self-confidence that allows me to think this. But I think things are changing.
I used to be embarrassed, even ashamed of the gay Asian community. I thought it was so trashy and pathetic and nasty that I would never become apart of it. I guess it was a combination of growing up in an Anglo private school -where the amount of racism against the 10 Asians in my year level was incomprehensible at times-, mixed with the stereotype and associations with rice queens, sticky rice (rice cookers?) and all that jazz. These days I laugh everything off. I don't have time to letterbox everyone and analyse situations. I just wanna do my thing and go my own way.
Going out on the scene in Melbourne over the past couple of months now, has really shown me a lot. Not trying to make this entry depressing, but being a halfcast really sucks at times. Everyone's like 'Ohh, that's really cool, you're a mix...' But really, it's a bitch. Especially being a halfcast and born in a country where neither of your parents are native... And then being gay...Uh. Genetic disposition seems to compensate most of us by making us gorgeous. Haha.
Mariah, you were wrong, you never really belong. When you're hanging with your mum's friends and family, you're the kid who's not all quite there, and vice versa with your father's friends and family. When you're at home, you are brought up three different ways. In this case, Filo, Khmer and Anglo. When I'm out with my Anglo friends, I'm the token Asian. When I'm out with my Asian friends, I'm the stuck-up Australian born. I hate when people assume I'm Anglo, and when they meet me in person, they're taken aback. I hate when people assume I can't speak English (a la that fucker in Kings Cross when after I spoke to him, he said 'Oh, I didn't realise you could speak English' Fuck you!) when really, my English shits all over those fuckers.
At the end of the day, there may be crap that comes with being a 'mix' but I do love being different. I love that I know no other Filobodians. I love that I'm Australian born, and I love being gay (hmm hussy...). At the end of the day, I know heaps of shit that no one else does about so many different cultures. And I'm better for it.
This entry just went in one big circle. It was an affirmation. Thanks for reading.
Really. Time to sleep.
PunkOnAir : Kelly Clarkson - Walk Away
posted by Christopher at 1:34 AM
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